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Vladimir PRIBYLOVSKY
ANIMAL FARM-2
Chapter 2(12)
After the defeat of the Emergency Swine Committee and the dispersal of the Swineburo, the former boar Borka and the black cat Khasan did not begin to restore the authority of Animal Breeder Mishka. It was declared that the ESC acted with the consent of Mishka, and that the theory, “beastliness with a human face,” which Mishka had stood up for, was only thought up for the sake of restoring the tyranny of the Boars On Four Feet. In order for other large boars and their Animal Soviets not to brawl, the whole farm was divided between Animal Breeders into 15 parts - including the three parts that had already long ago declared themselves a part of humanity.
Animal Breeder Borka confirmed the right of all animals to grunt, cackle, hiss and make any other sound as well and ordered to have this written on the external wall of the barn. The party Boars On Four Feet was subjected to a temporary ban. Pigs from the party Boars Upright even put forth a humanitarian requirement forbidding all animals to walk on four legs at all.
Having secured victory, Animal Breeder Borka rested on his laurels. He relaxed on the ground in front of the manor house, drank whisky and was fed from the hands of the rather old but gluttonous raven Moses. The raven Moses still liked to tell the animal fairytale about Sugarcandy Mountain, in which the animals get everything after they die. Moses was considered a faithful supporter of Borka, but once he fell asleep, the raven flew away to be fed by other boars (especially the chief of the big barn, the pig Luzhok), and then flew to visit the tailless dog Reshka.
Animal Breeder Borka entrusted his new adviser, the gander Gurgulis with management of the farm. Gander Gurgulis introduced Borka to a whole flight of young and very clever geese. The cleverest were two gander friends, the fat round goose Guy-Gar and the redheaded goose Ga-Gais. The fat goose Guy-Gar explained to Borka that the age-old dream of animals, that is, universal humanization, could be accomplished simply. To achieve this, it was necessary to convince just the pigs to stand on their hind legs, and after them the other animals would do the same. In order for the pigs not to resist, it was necessary to give them the right of free feeding - that is, the right to eat everything they like that catches their eye.
In order for the other animals not to become indignant, they too needed to be given the same rights as on the other farms- every dog the right to its own kennel, chain and a big iron bowl, every goose - the right to cackle everywhere and as much as necessary, every horse - the right to its own saddle, every sheep - the right to its own sheers, and so on. Every animal would be given a certificate stating that it had this right.
The redheaded goose Ga-Gais proposed that such certificates be made of maple leaves with some fine words written on them. Moreover, these maple leaves could be used temporarily in place of clothes. As is well known, bipeds also did not immediately begin to wear jeans and dress coats - they began with fig leaves. Redhead Ga-Gais immediately had many fans - hens, ducks, elderly geese and lambs. Even the furious goose Kaleriia recognized the wisdom of the redheaded Ga-Gais. She softened to the upright boars and she accused those geese who doubted the innate nobility and humanity of Ga-Gais of beastliness.
Former pigs highly valued the right to free feeding and used it willingly. The boar Shvartzenmord, whose duty even in the time of boar Brezhnev was cleaning the oil pipe, used the right of free feeding to take the pipe for himself. Former boar Luzhok obtained permission from Breeder Borka to take, by the right of free feeding, the big barn, and Borka’s guard dog, the wolfhound Korzhik took the lawn around the manor house. Both the wolfhound Korzhik and the former boar Luzhok took possession of tamed rats. Tamed rats in general had become fashionable among boars and dogs.
To all the other animals, redheaded Ga-Gais handed out maple leaves, on which it was written, “’Four is good, but two is better’ – Animal Breeder Borka.” The sheep liked the leaves very much: they tried not to part with them and often the whole herd bleated the words written on them.
The black cat Khasan and tailless dog Reshka received the right to free feeding in an increased size because of their service, but still remained dissatisfied. The cat Khasan passed, in the Animal Soviet, a decree that on the maple leaves some other words should be written, for example, “four legs are two,” and most of all it should not be the impostors Ga-Gais and Guy-Gar that supervise the distribution of leaves, but the Main Animal Soviet, headed by Khasan. The dog Reshka supported Khasan but the gander Gurgulis first accused Khasan and Reshka, and then the entire Main Animal Soviet, of outright beastliness.
At first, Animal Breeder Borka did not pay any attention to the squabble between the geese and the cat Khasan and peacefully drank his whisky. Then, angered by the constant noise, he banished the goose Guy-Gar and appointed the boar Shvartsenmord in his place, with whom the cat Khasan promised to live in peace. But the cat Khasan did not keep his promise and, just like before, quarrelled every day, turning the Animal Soviet against Borka. Eventually it so bothered Animal Breeder Borka that he ordered the dogs to disperse the Main Animal Soviet, and at the same time, all remaining Animal Soviets. In the process of the dispersal the dogs bit several hundred sheep - followers of the cat Khasan or simply curious ones, and at the same time also a pair of especially annoying geese, loyal supporters of Borka (as if by mistake).
Animal Breeder Borka declared that the cat Khasan and the tailless dog Reshka, who raised the terrible noise, were pigs and inveterate enemies of humanity. Only the drunken good nature of Borka saved the black cat Khasan and the tailless dog Reshka from the worst. But they were kept in the cold cellar for some time for their own betterment.
To cause fear among the dissatisfied, the chief of the big barn, the former boar Luzhok, ordered the dogs to expel all black cats from the barn and its vicinity. The dogs went too far as usual. They bit and chased out not only the black cats, but at the same time black ducks, cocks and rooks. But then order and peace were restored. The animals were surprised to notice that during the dispersal of the Animal Soviet, and in the restoration of order in the big barn, several rats who no one had ever seen before, worked together with the dogs and ganders. The boar Luzhok and wolfhound Korzhik explained to those who were curious, that these rat-mutants had mastered upright walking and embarked on the way to humanity.
The cock Shakh wrote new laws for Animal Breeder Borka. Under the laws of the cock Shakh, the former boar Borka was declared the Enlightened Animal Breeder, and the Animal Soviets were dissolved. Upon hearing this, the Boars On Four Feet slightly squealed in their pigsties, but the wolfhound Korzhik barked at them just once and they stopped. In place of the Animal Soviets, the Sweetbriars were created. The only duty of the animals elected to the Sweetbriars was to develop upright walking, and their only right, the right to hiss.
To the surprise and regret of the cock Shakh and the gander Gurgulis, very few real geese and Boars Upright were elected to the Main Sweetbriar of the farm. Moreover, the geese immediately divided into the “Geese Optimists” (their lead geese, Guy-Gar and Ga-Gais) and the “Geese Pessimists” who had for their leader a particularly grumpy goose named Grigoria. The Geese Optimists cackled loudly that “Animal Breeder Borka is always right,” and the Geese Pessimists hissed that, “Animal Breeder Borka is a drunken pig.”
But most seats in the Main Sweetbriar went to the party “Geese Humanists.” In reality they were such strange, petty pigs and even a few dogs who liked to walk on their heads and pass themselves off as geese. The leader of this faction was bipedal in essence and nicknamed Zhmurik. It was said that in the days of the boar Breshka, Zhmurik, walked on four legs and pretended to be a pig, and in the days of Boar Mishka, he looked absolutely like a duck and stuck with the geese. Now he was leading a bad race of pigs and dogs and said that the fastest way to humanity was to elect him Animal Breeder and Authoritative Humaniser. To the question about who he was and from where he came, the Goose Humanist Zhmurik answered that he was a direct descendent of Napoleon’s old friend, the lawyer Vimper, from his marriage to a sheep of the local breed.
Besides the supporters of Goose-Humanist Zhmurik, the animals had elected to the Sweetbriar a large number of clumsy pigs from the resurrected party Boars On Four Feet. The head of the party Boars On Four Feet was the warty wild boar Ziuka.
The majority of Boars On Four Feet were not able to walk on their hind legs at all, and breaking all decorum, even hissed from the platform while standing on four legs. They condemned the maple leaves from the very beginning and did not wear them, asserting that, “animals should embrace their nudity.” Somewhere the Boars On Four Feet dug up the full, original text of the Seven Commandments and made a big fuss with them. Some of the Boars On Four Feet said that actually, one or two commandments had become outdated anyway and cancelled them. “For example, it is possible to cancel the commandment ‘No animal shall drink alcohol,’” they said, and appealingly looked into the eyes of the Enlightened Animal Breeder Borka.
The Geese Humanists and Boars on Four Feet often hissed at each other, but having caught sight of the geese Guy-Gar and Ga-Gais, they united and began to grunt at them, and even to bark.
Also elected to the Sweetbriar were two tens of boar bipeds, a dozen sheep, five petty Dog Restorers, a few hens and ducks, a pair of cats, and about ten bipedal rats. It is interesting that the rats did not begin to create their own faction, but spread out among those previously created. In the faction of Geese Humanists, the rats cackled and walked on their heads, in the faction of Boars on Four Feet, they playfully ran on four paws, and in the company of the Geese Optimists, as is fitting, they walked in a straight line with the others and said clever words about the success of humanization.
Besides these, in the Sweetbriar there ended up a fair number of thick thoroughbred pigs, who made a faction of “Boar Pragmatists.” At home they preferred to go on four legs, but in the Sweetbriar and other public places, they moved to two. They said that as a whole they supported the program of humanization by Animal Breeder Borka, but would not mingle with the Geese Optimists. The acknowledged leader of the Boar Pragmatists was the inspector of the pipe, the boar Shvartzenmord, although some of them also showed their love and respect for the former boar Luzhok. Both Shvartzenmord and Luzhok because of age and old habits were poorly able to walk on two legs and openly declared that the main thing was to cultivate the kitchen gardens in a humane way, and that upright walking was just a trifle. “Maybe mankind itself, having gazed upon the success of our farm, will want to stand on four legs,” they said.
The Boar Pragmatists were big supporters of the ex-boar Borka, and the theory of enlightened cattle breeding. Those who disagreed with this theory pointed their legs towards the dirt-covered warts of the Boar on Four Feet Ziuka and asked “Does a Napoleon sound good to you?”
Ziuka liked to say that if he were the leader of the farm, it would all be as it was under Napoleon, but with one exception- the geese and ducks would also walk on four legs.
…In the meantime, the situation on the farm became worse and worse.
Pigs grew and bred with unbelievable speed, and there were no old pigsties left for them, so they were divided between their parents by the goose Ga-Gais. The birth rate of the sheep, however, had fallen, not to mention the fact that they sheered themselves poorly.
A flock of wild black cats declared independence and quickly converted to humanity on the highest mountain of trash on the edge of the farm where they lived. The dogs could not stand for this and persuaded the boar Borka to send them to the trash heap on a retaliatory expedition. Against all expectations, although the dogs chewed up many cats and kittens, they could do nothing to solve the problem. Severe fights between the dogs and the black cats became a part of ordinary life, just like the daily attacks of wild rats. The impudent cats sometimes even made attacks on lonely henhouses quite far away from their own garbage heap.
The guard dog of the Enlightened Animal Breeder Borka, the wolfhound Korzhik, did not like to fight with the cats on the garbage heap very much. Out of boredom, he first cursed at Shvatzenmord, then barked loudly throughout the barn at the former boar Luzhok, and joked with his own setters and tamed rats about nice it would be to somehow arrange a goose-hunt.
The geese became worried and wrote to Animal Breeder Borka with denunciations of the wolfhound Korzhik, accusing him of hidden beastliness. They rustled and shook the laws that were once written by the cock Shakh, but in them, nothing said that the wolfhound Korzhik could not, if he wanted, hunt geese.
Unable to cope with the wolfhound Korzhik, the geese vented their anger on the bulldog New Restorer Dimson, the hater of sheep of the Ashtrakhan breed. From time to time the geese, together with the sheep, surrounded the bulldog, hissed at him and threw sheep dung at him. Poor Dimson only dared to creep out of the kennel at night.
At last, from God knows where, the bald goose Abrau-Derso whispered something to a drunk Borka about Korzhik, after which Borka banished Korzhik from the lawn around manor house together with all his pack of greyhounds, setters and wolfhounds.
The retired wolfhound Korzhik and the former boar Luzhok accused Abrau-Derso of friendship with the wild rats and supplying sheep milk to the wild cats from the trash heap. To this, the bald Abrau-Derso replied that he, like Luzhok and Korzhik, maintained business relations fostering tame, two-legged rats but had nothing to do with the wild ones. He kept significantly quiet about the wild cats, confirming everyone’s worst suspicions about the accusations.
On the advice of Abrau-Derso, Animal Breeder Borka also took a new retinue of wild rats. They were no worse at protecting Borka than the pack of wolfhound Korzhik- always biting only each other, but sometimes the whole pack attacked any one other rat and bit it to death.
For the advisor of the ex-boar Borka, the redheaded Ga-Gais, this was all very unpleasant, and he was always quarrelling and then reconciling with the gander Abrau-Derso. He was afraid of the tamed rats and tried not to get into disputes with them. His policies included advancing his own pupils in assistance to Borka. One such aide, the duckling Kiriushka, managed to become, momentarily, the favourite of Borka and even took away Shvartsenmord’s oil pipe for a little while.
Animal Breeder Borka ceased to move on his hind legs and in general ceased to move at all. More and more often he was laying at home, lapping up whisky, not paying any attention to the angry hissing of geese in the Sweetbriar, the gloomy view of Ga-Gais, the cries of the humanist Zhmurika, and the hungry bleating of sheep on trodden pastures.
The oil pipe had become clogged and there was no one to clean it. Having saved the pipe from the duckling Kiriushka, Shvartsenmord now only pretended that he cared for it and trained himself in upright movement and the use of whisky. Because of this, bipeds from the neighbouring farms began to consider him the wisest advisor and the lawful successor to the former boar Borka.
The horses all as one aspired to be elected to the abundant fodder in the Sweetbriar and did not work. The wolfhounds and setters completely stopped chasing the wild rats, distanced themselves from the war with the black cats and also vied with one another as candidates for the Sweetbriar, where they hissed at each other and even at the Animal Breeder Borka. In this sphere of action, the retired wolfhound Ptichka became particularly famous and got approval from the sheep. His ornate statements, (“to walk like a goat chasing a carrot,” “to make a goat’s face at a cat,” “for the setters, I'll repeat myself…,” and “the lawful place for a rat is a trap,”) became proverbs and sayings. The disgraced wolfhound Korzhik wrote, with the help of one goose, memoirs of his service to the ex-boar Borka and on a wave of literary glory was also elected to the Sweetbriar.
The old, clever boar-pragmatist, Primus became the other popular figure. He looked very similar to the late boar Breshka, under whom all of the animal’s rations had been raised. Unlike the dog Ptichka, Primus did not make ornate statements, but kept more and more silent. When he grunted something he did it very sensibly.
In the meantime, the wild rats gnawed everything in succession - the grain, root crops, the clogged pipe, the straw and each other. They united into bigger packs and these packs attacked the other animals. In some of the rat packs one could find some very big figures - whether they were gigantic rat mutants fleeing from the nursery of Luzhok and Abrau-Derso or setters going wild.
While the rats were gnawing mainly sheep and hens, they did not touch anyone in particular. But once they, in the course of a week, bit to death and ate a few pigs - alright if it had been impoverished pigs, but no, they were large thoroughbred boars and even one who had just been elected to the Sweetbriar. The Goose Humanist Zhmurik authoritatively asserted that this boar from the Sweetbriar was not really a boar, but a rat-mutant, who was beaten by his kinsman….
A few more years passed. Animal Breeder Borka had completely taken to drinking, and died rising on four legs just before he passed away. On the eve of his death, he wrote a will in which was written the name of the new Enlightened Cattle Breeder, who should become his successor. On the will, as confirmed by the tamed rats and dog-wolfhounds, Borka wrote with such chicken scratch, that the name was impossible to read.
The humanist Zhmurik (who had just been declaring that he was never a goose or a duck, but was always a farmer, a descendent of the Enlightened Cattle Breeder Jones) asserted that his name was written on the will, and demanded a graphological examination. The Boar Pragmatists divided into three groups, one insisting that the will named the ex-boar Luzhok, another that it was the ex-boar Primus, and the third that it was the boar Shvartsenmord.
The Dog Restorers barked across the whole farm, that the Enlightened Cattle Breeder could only be a wolfhound, and threatened to bite all dissenters. The sheep, hens and geese were afraid, that like the last time, they would be the first bitten, and because of this now agreed to everything.
At this point, suddenly, three henhouses burned down together with the hens inside. The bipedal rats from the retinue of the late boar Borka declared that the black cats from the separatist trash heap were guilty of starting the fires. For revenge the heap was set ablaze, and it began to emit a burning smell across the whole farm. So the dogs were given a permanent job - to catch the black cats escaping from the smoke and for this they received increased fodder rations.
Finally the boars agreed about something with the dogs, and through a joint effort, the will had at last been deciphered.
The will of ex-boar Borka as it turned out, was actually a developed program for the further humanization of the farm. All former boars, the deceased Borka instructed, were to be given subsidies for repairing the pigsties and a decisive struggle with the wild rats. The sheep were to lead the re-cultivation of the pastures. The dogs were given the right to bite the cats and kittens (in particular the black ones). The geese were given the promise to rise on two legs, and the raven Moses was given a big gilded perch in the centre of the farm and a daily trough full of slop and beer soaked bread crusts. To the farmer-humanist Zhmurika, the deceased Borka bequeathed an appointment as trade representative to the farm of Pilkington and the retired wolfhound Ptichka was to sit on a chain at the back gate.
“To successfully carry out all these reforms,” it was said in the will of Borka, “it takes much more than a mere authoritative humaniser, but a truly enlightened Cattle Breeder or, in other words, a Ringleader. All the necessary qualifications required of the enlightened Ringleader, are completely suited to the officer of my new guard Khoryok. Khoryok, by the way, has brought a visible contribution to the development of the theory of enlightened Ringleader, the burning of the garbage heap, and the struggle with the wild black cats.”
It was recommended that the inauguration of Khoryok be carried out immediately after the will had been deciphered.
“Where did he get this enlightened Khoryok from?” The animals were bewildered. Some said that Khoryok was a distant relative of the boar Shvartsenmord, others said that he was a tamed rat from the nursery of Abrau-Derso, and still others whispered that he was a direct descendent of the terrible pig Napoleon.
But the reconciled geese Ga-Gais and Abrau-Derso surprised everyone when together they declared that Khoryok was a fluffy white goose. Thus, according to their words, Khoryok was wise like a boar, sharp-toothed like a wolfhound, and invincible like a pack of rats.
“What beastliness!” - splashed the wings of the goose Kaleriia, becoming hoarse in recent days from hissing in support of the preferential right of Ga-Gais to succeed Borka.
Fraught with curiosity, all the animals gathered in the barn, where they were to be shown the white, fluffy Khoryok at his inauguration.
Climbing up on a scaffold, balancing on his hind legs, a sickly looking little animal, who at first glance looked like a greyhound, a tamed rat, and an unfattened little boar all at the same time, but with a duck’s nose. This was, in fact, the future enlightened Ringleader Khoryok.
Some geese in the back rows incited by the hoarse goose Kaleriia, began to hiss discontentedly, “It's one of Borka’s rats! And not very tame, we saw him earlier!”
Other animals, without time to bat an eyelid, watched as one goose-troublemaker was unintentionally butted by the horn of a drunk goat, and another was crushed to death by the wheel of a cart that came from god knows where. Wet white droppings from pigeons began to fall on Kaleriia.
“I’m afraid this is all happening for a reason…” pensively cackled goose Grigori to his Geese Pessimists.
The Geese Pessimists flapped their wings and scattered. Some were close enough to go to the gates of the barn and flew away, and some to the rafters, where they were closer to the ex-boars. Boar Primus, wanting to grunt similarly, changed his mind and pretended to be old, lame and deaf.
Two dogs ceremonially carried in and threw at the feet of Khoryok a black cat-instigator, taken from the garbage heap especially for the inauguration. The cat had one eye, was bitten all over, and had no tail.
“Drown the cats!” bellowed the dogs.
Khoryok lifted his hind leg above the shivering cat, and released upon him a lavish murky stream. The stream ricocheted and splashed on those who were crowded on the scaffold, the dogs, boars, Abrau Derso and Ga-Gais. The redheaded Ga-Gais pretended that he did not notice it, and Abrau-Derso began, in a loud whisper, to convince everyone there that he was very close to Khoryok and because of this, got wetter than the others.
“Death to cats!” grunted the warty boar Ziuka, pushing to the first row.
“Drown the cats, kittens and geese too!” cackled the ex-Goose Humanist farmer Zmurik.
“Glory…this…Rin…Ring…Glory to Khoryok!” grunted the ex-boar Shvartsenmord.
“Blessings of Sugarcandy Mountain to our Khoryok! The anathema to black cats!” came the barely audible caw of the old raven Moses.
“Glory to Khoryok!” barked Reshka and Korzhik.
“Glory to Khoryok!” yelped from the crowd the bulldog New Restorer Dimson, already half trampled by a crowd of sheep from his hated Astrakhan breed.
“Glory to Khoryok!” came from all the way at the back gate, where the chained up wolfhound Ptichka barked.
“Glory to Khoryok! Four legs good, two legs better,” said Ga-Gais.
“Glory! Glory! Glory to Khoryok!” bleated the sheep.
“Glory to Khoryok,” Luzhok declared in a lofty tone.
”Glory to Khoryok! Drown! Drown! Drown the cats!” a chorus of dogs howled.
“Glory to Khoryok! Drown the cats!” cuckooed the hens.
Khoryok stood before all, lifted his paw and peed and peed and peed and peed. How could so much liquid was come from such a small animal!
Which was his breed - whether he was a young greyhound, or a duck from the ranks of Ga-Gais, or a piglet from the party of Boar Pragmatists, or a two-legged rat from the nursery of the bald gander Abrau-Derso - the animals had no clue. But he had eyes like a fish.
1995-2002
See Chapter 1(11)
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